Long Distance, Bit Weird

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week it's time for us to go deep inside the world of Nigel Farage. From plane crashes to election losses to constantly getting covered in milkshake...this guy knows how to live a life! So much so that we've spread him out over two episodes. Mmmm spread em, Nige. Part one takes us from his birth to 2015. Episode two next week (or already available exclusively on our Patreon).
ALSO: someone writes in with a business idea in the latest edition of the hit segment "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News."
Be sure to subscribe to the Long Distance, Bit Weird Patreon for bonus audio and video episodes. Episode two of this deep-dive in to Nigel Farage is up now on the Patreon!
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ANNOUNCEMENTS
ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS. Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza pals is full of funny jokes and silly ideas, and it's available on Bandcamp!
SHOWS!
September 13 - Sooz guesting on NonCensored - The Last Show @ Kings Place, London - TICKETS
September 17th - Sooz and Michael are on together at Laugh Sabbath @ Comedy Bar (Bloor St), Toronto - TICKETS
November 4th - Sooz's new show Imposter @ Pleasance, London - TICKETS

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. 
Are you ready to FARM? You'd better be, because this week's episode is about the wild and erotic history of British agricultural shows. Why? Because Sooz and Michael recently attended one, and it featured top tier livestock, a band playing Rolling Stones covers, and a parade of vintage tractors operated by middle class men cosplaying as farmers. Get into it, city slicker.
ALSO: a new, cider-themed edition of the hit segment "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News."
Be sure to subscribe to the Long Distance, Bit Weird Patreon for bonus audio and video episodes, like our recent Only Fools and Horses watch-along of the episode "Who's a Pretty Boy?" (Series 03, Episode 07). 
***
ANNOUNCEMENTS
ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS. Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza pals is full of funny jokes and silly ideas, and it's available on Bandcamp!
SHOWS!
September 3rd - Michael at Laugh Sabbath @ Comedy Bar (Bloor St), Toronto - TICKETS
September 6th - Sooz at Sunday Cabaret @ Royal Vauxhall Tavern, London - TICKETS
September 10th - Sooz at Stand Up for Gaza @ Old Queen's Head, Islington - TICKETS
September 13 - Sooz guesting on NonCensored - The Last Show @ Kings Place, London - TICKETS
November 4th - Sooz's new show Imposter @ Pleasance, London - TICKETS
 

Over on our Patreon we reviewed Vietnam War epic The Deer Hunter, a film Michael had never seen until this week. In this preview we are discussing various actors who were offered the role of the phantom in the terrible 2004 Phantom of the Opera movie. To hear the full hour-long episode (you know, the actual review) and gain access to all of our exclusive content please head to our Patreon. Thanks!

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. 
After an interruption of services due to the Edinburgh Fringe, LDBW returns to the airwaves with a very nice episode. Sooz and Michael talk about Edinburgh, Dolly Parton, Tim Curry, a big night out in Reigate, life as pub quiz champions, and why it's not good for dogs to roll around in fox excrement.
ALSO: a new, dog-focused edition of the hit segment "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News."
Be sure to subscribe to the Long Distance, Bit Weird Patreon for bonus audio and video episodes, like our recent Only Fools and Horses watch-along of the episode "Who's a Pretty Boy?" (Series 03, Episode 07). 
***
ANNOUNCEMENTS
ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS. Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza pals is full of funny jokes and silly ideas, and it's available on Bandcamp!
SHOWS!
September 3rd - Michael at Laugh Sabbath @ Comedy Bar (Bloor St), Toronto - TICKETS
September 6th - Sooz at Sunday Cabaret @ Royal Vauxhall Tavern, London - TICKETS
September 10th - Sooz at Stand Up for Gaza @ Old Queen's Head, Islington TICKETS
 
SOOZ KEMPNER - IMPOSTER - 2026 TOUR
3rd October Aberystwyth Comedy Festival TICKETS
9th October Oxford Old Fire Station TICKETS
15th October Hertford BEAM TICKETS
25th October Brighton Komedia TICKETS
4th November Pleasance London TICKETS
6th November Chelsmford Theatre TICKETS
7th November Cambridge Junction TICKETS
22nd November Cardiff Millennium Centre TICKETS
23rd November Bristol The Gaffe TICKETS
27th November Gravesend The Woodsville TICKETS
29th November Colchester Arts Centre TICKETS
5th December Newcastle Northern Stage TICKETS
6th December York Theatre@41 TICKETS
10th December Manchester Fairfield Social TICKETS

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. 
This week LDBW returns to a favourite subject, as Sooz educates Michael on Michael Jackson's 1988 "Moonwalker" film, and the subsequent 1990 video game "Michael Jackson's Moonwalker." What did Joe Pesci and Michael talk about on the Moonwalker set? Is the plot of the Moonwalker movie the daydream of a demented pervert? Do small children play a major role in both the Moonwalker movie and video game? Listen to find out!
ALSO: a new edition of the hit segment "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News" that tackles the subject of ale vouchers head-on! 
Be sure to subscribe to the Long Distance, Bit Weird Patreon for bonus audio and video episodes, like our recent Only Fools and Horses watch-along of the episode "Who's a Pretty Boy?" (Series 03, Episode 07). 
***
ANNOUNCEMENTS
ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS. Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza pals is full of funny jokes and silly ideas, and it's available on Bandcamp!
SHOWS!
See Sooz's new show "Imposter" at the Edinburgh Fringe, August 15-23 - TICKETS
See Michael perform standup - All The Best - August 15 at Comedy Bar Bloor Street in Toronto - TICKETS

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada. It's like something out of a Philip K. Dick novel. 
This week Sooz introduces Michael to the classic British sitcom Only Fools and Horses, which ran from 1981-2003 over seven series and sixteen Christmas specials. What's the show about? Why do millions of people love it? Who is Del Boy? And were all of the episodes really written by just one man i.e. show creator John Sullivan? Listen to find out the answer to these questions and more!
PLUS: sign up to the Long Distance, Bit Weird Patreon for our Only Fools and Horses watch-along of the episode "Who's a Pretty Boy?" (Series 03, Episode 07). 
ALSO: a new edition of the hit segment "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News." 
***
ANNOUNCEMENTS
ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS - Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza Pals is available for on Bandcamp now!
SHOWS!
See Sooz's new show "Imposter" at the Edinburgh Fringe, August 15-23 - TICKETS
Sooz - August 9th - IMPOSTER preview - 4pm @ Caroline of Brunswick, Brighton - TICKETS

We're watching a clip from Alley Cats, the new animated series where cats swear. This is just a preview of course. To hear the full hour-long episode (which includes discussions of the alleged decline of Mr Gervais and his work, along with some chat about Katie Price) and gain access to all of our exclusive content please head to our Patreon. Thanks!

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week, in the run-up to an exciting British by-election, Sooz tells Michael about the satirical political figure known as Count Binface, the latest in a long line of British novelty candidates like Lord Buckethead and Screaming Lord Sutch. If you thought politicians were clowns before... well, just listen!!!
ALSO: a new edition of the hit segment "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News." PLUS: Sooz describes an Instagram post!
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If you like what you hear, you can support Long Distance, Bit Weird on Patreon. Subscribers will get early access to episodes, bonus content and special surprises. In fact, you can watch several Travelodge episodes, along with the classic British animated films Watership Down and the bonkers Canadian documentary Project Grizzly in FULL right now with witty/sweary commentary from Sooz and Michael. 
***
ANNOUNCEMENT
ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS - Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza Pals is available for on Bandcamp now!
SHOWS!
See Sooz's new show "Imposter" at the Edinburgh Fringe, August 15-23 - TICKETS

This is just a preview of course. To hear the full hour-long episode (which includes discussions of the Tate Brothers going to jail) and gain access to all of our exclusive content please head to our Patreon. Thanks!

Welcome to Long Distance, Bit Weird, a podcast from international comedy couple Sooz Kempner and Michael Balazo. One of them lives in the UK, the other in Canada.
This week, Sooz and Michael give an unvarnished review of Sir Christopher Nolan's cinematic adaptation of The Odyssey. What were the highlights? Where did Sir Christopher mess up big time? How gross was it inside the Trojan Horse? And should there have been a scene that let us see the Cyclops going on a date? Yes.
ALSO: a new edition of the hit segment "Actual Customer Letters to Wetherspoon News" featuring TWO letters. PLUS: you get to hear about the two most exciting teams in the World Cup: England and Canada. IN ADDITION: meal reviews.
---
If you like what you hear, you can support Long Distance, Bit Weird on Patreon. Subscribers will get early access to episodes, bonus content and special surprises. In fact, you can watch several Travelodge episodes, along with the classic British animated films Watership Down and the bonkers Canadian documentary Project Grizzly in FULL right now with witty/sweary commentary from Sooz and Michael. 
***
ANNOUNCEMENT
ATTENTION: HUMOUR FANS - Michael Balazo's new, much-anticipated 3rd standup comedy album "Pizza Pals" is out NOW! Recorded in November of 2025, Pizza Pals is available for on Bandcamp now!
SHOWS!
See Sooz's new show "Imposter" at the Edinburgh Fringe, August 15-23 - TICKETS
July 25 - Michael is doing standup at Just Four Laughs - Comedy Bar Toronto - TICKETS